The very first memory I have of her was when we were in Tanauan. I was visiting my parents then, was so young and had a fever. She was checking me out for mom was freaking out when she saw a little bit of blood in my vomit. She easily persuaded mom that everything was okay.
After that, all my memory of her was that she worked in the states, occasionally calling and occasionally visiting the Philippines. Our eldest, would tell me all about her, at that point, I always believed her. She was supposedly a sister of mine, who was working hard in the states. A sister who was devoted in helping all of her siblings, a sister, who my parents were using, a sister who had a little control of the family because she was earning more than anyone, a sister who was also helping us out so I was in no way supposed to piss her off. Back then, I get to talk to her on the phone or get a letter once in awhile, she sounded different to my big confusion, she always asked about how I was doing, and the only orders I got from her was to get my grades up. Our eldest had this thing, being soft spoken but deadly, saying one thing but acting the opposite, so I figured maybe the other one was the same. I always thought, that instead of telling me I had to follow her directives because she was capable of stuff, it would have gone better if people would had just asked me to respect her as a sister. But then again, we are talking about me here, I think I would still rebel that hard, only if I was told to respect her instead of fear her, I would had have someone to actually talk to about the problems I had. But that’s the past now, getting to know her was hard at first, I realized who she really was when my husband tried to point out what was real, and what was not. I had only been able to know her thru my husband’s eyes, which was a real “eye” opener so to speak.
I had concluded that this sister of mine is as complex as anyone I know, yes opinionated to a fault, a control freak when it comes to her siblings, as head strong as me when she thinks she is right, a total workaholic and a lot more, the only difference is that, no matter how she is, specially with us, its because a part of the reason why she does these things is because she cares for us, the other part, I honestly can say I’m still trying to figure out. It is just nice that the myths had been separated from what is real.
Don’t get me wrong, I firmly believe she is crazy sometimes, most of the time she is sane, being older gives her more power over her younger siblings I guess, but I would never EVER discount the fact that she truly loves us, no matter who we are, and what we are, that’s why she is crazily overprotective.
One thing though, I am still discovering who she is, I still get surprise when she does the complete opposite of what I was told, like the preconditioned idea of her , and what I am discovering about her, I honestly truly love.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Touching base
I recently reconnected with people I know in my past. The memories I have with most of these people are good. I’ve seen them all grown up now, with families and careers. I also see them living all over the world that makes me proud to know them. Their dreams when we were smaller had evolved and so had they.
As for some of them, my last memory of them are hurtful, and guess what, I am the one doing the hurting way back then. In spite of this past, to my huge relief, they have gracefully forgiven me for my transgressions, which made them saints to my eyes. So just a few days ago, I decided to touch base and find all former friends and ask for them to exonerate me. Again, lo and behold, almost all of them did.
To the ones who haven’t yet, I will be looking forward when they do decide to be merciful, but for now I am content that I was able to ask them. I’m really lucky to have found these frenemies and have been able to apologize. At least now, I could sleep a little bit better than before. Not that I wasn’t sleeping better before, just more betterer now! Hahaha!
now if only asking for forgiveness is that easy with loved ones, just how to go about it, hmmm, scary, can't convey what i really want to say. time to think really hard.
As for some of them, my last memory of them are hurtful, and guess what, I am the one doing the hurting way back then. In spite of this past, to my huge relief, they have gracefully forgiven me for my transgressions, which made them saints to my eyes. So just a few days ago, I decided to touch base and find all former friends and ask for them to exonerate me. Again, lo and behold, almost all of them did.
To the ones who haven’t yet, I will be looking forward when they do decide to be merciful, but for now I am content that I was able to ask them. I’m really lucky to have found these frenemies and have been able to apologize. At least now, I could sleep a little bit better than before. Not that I wasn’t sleeping better before, just more betterer now! Hahaha!
now if only asking for forgiveness is that easy with loved ones, just how to go about it, hmmm, scary, can't convey what i really want to say. time to think really hard.
Monday, October 26, 2009
The third
My bro the engineer is one of the people I most admire. Don’t get me wrong, I will also talk about my other great siblings, and I admire them too, but for now, let me talk about my bro. again let me say he is a great engineer, very quite, opinionated, often moody, artistic, constantly a realist. That’s how I perceived him when I was younger.
When we grew up, he change just a bit, still a realist, still moody, opinionate – even more so, artistic - I don’t know about that no more, and he is not quite anymore, maybe because he met my sister-in-law, let me just say he bloomed under her ministration.
Like my other siblings, he was blessed with a great mind, I often said to myself that he can calculate faster than superman, but I guess, he should be being an engineer and superman was known to be faster than a speeding bullet not great in numbers, in fact he was just a journalist. He was great in numbers, he tried to teach me, but I guess he wasn’t a teacher of a wandering mind; he couldn’t impart his greatness to me back in high school. When he took his board, there was no surprise that he placed very high, at that time when everyone was congratulating him, I was wondering to myself, duh! Didn’t anyone but me expected him to place. Then I realized, he questioned himself back then. And looking back, he often question himself, a lot, maybe this is the pitfall of an intelligent man, I wouldn’t know, I am good at school but not like the caliber of my siblings.
And of all my siblings, I talk to him the least. Maybe because, when we were growing up, I made his life more miserable being connected to me. I could understand his misery of being a big brother to me especially. I just wished he understood why I was such in that state. I never asked him if he really understood, even in the present tense. But having his kind of mind, I think he had came to a conclusion, I don’t know if it’s a good conclusion or not, but whatever it is, I hope he’ll love me as much as I do him, anyway who wouldn’t love a misguided relative, a younger sister at that.
For now, my greatest worry of him is his health, as I’ve said, of all of my siblings; I talk to him the least. We sometimes talk, awkwardly, but at least talk, its hard to outright ask him about his health, especially when we almost know nothing about each other now. At least, I could outright ask God to keep him healthy.
Keep safe bro!
When we grew up, he change just a bit, still a realist, still moody, opinionate – even more so, artistic - I don’t know about that no more, and he is not quite anymore, maybe because he met my sister-in-law, let me just say he bloomed under her ministration.
Like my other siblings, he was blessed with a great mind, I often said to myself that he can calculate faster than superman, but I guess, he should be being an engineer and superman was known to be faster than a speeding bullet not great in numbers, in fact he was just a journalist. He was great in numbers, he tried to teach me, but I guess he wasn’t a teacher of a wandering mind; he couldn’t impart his greatness to me back in high school. When he took his board, there was no surprise that he placed very high, at that time when everyone was congratulating him, I was wondering to myself, duh! Didn’t anyone but me expected him to place. Then I realized, he questioned himself back then. And looking back, he often question himself, a lot, maybe this is the pitfall of an intelligent man, I wouldn’t know, I am good at school but not like the caliber of my siblings.
And of all my siblings, I talk to him the least. Maybe because, when we were growing up, I made his life more miserable being connected to me. I could understand his misery of being a big brother to me especially. I just wished he understood why I was such in that state. I never asked him if he really understood, even in the present tense. But having his kind of mind, I think he had came to a conclusion, I don’t know if it’s a good conclusion or not, but whatever it is, I hope he’ll love me as much as I do him, anyway who wouldn’t love a misguided relative, a younger sister at that.
For now, my greatest worry of him is his health, as I’ve said, of all of my siblings; I talk to him the least. We sometimes talk, awkwardly, but at least talk, its hard to outright ask him about his health, especially when we almost know nothing about each other now. At least, I could outright ask God to keep him healthy.
Keep safe bro!
house hunting
Transferring to a new home is a tedious process. It’s all that work that sets me off actually, how I wish I could just rub a magic lamp and asks the genie to magically transport me to the new home, especially if you come from a flooded home.
You may think it’s supposed to be faster since most of your things, yup most not half, are considered trash. I think it’s the mentality we have called. You’d try to save anything salvageable or with sentimental value. When the water started to rise, the only things I was able to secure were the pictures and some stuff I couldn’t live without. So sorting thru the “trash” was a horrible experience. Another thing that made it harder was the fact that everyone, I mean everyone was also moving upward because of the flood, so rental fee went up, the house that went P5k before was being rented out between P7500 to P9500. So it was really hard.
The house we got is a miniature one, maybe by our standards. We are used to get a big rental house, probably because we are a big family. I am not really complaining, after looking for almost three weeks, it’s decent enough, but still, every time someone moves, they are bound to hit someone or something. Picture this, when you enter our place, the first thing you’ll see is the dining table and there’s that itsy bitsy space that you can pass thru (if you move sideways, it will be faster and you’ll not bump the wall or the table) so you’ll reach the bedroom door. The only plus thing about having a small house is we didn’t have much to put in it so it will do. But I still worry for the incoming future. You see my relatives from the states are coming, and I don’t have a clue where to put them, maybe I’ll suggest camping under the stars for a day, the kids would have a good time, imagining them all in the house makes me really smile, it would be nice to have them over, cause its been awhile, but I think the house would whine. Gotta make a plan soon, I don’t see my siblings/hubby being comfortable in my place. But I would guarantee the talk we would share about the house. If there’s one thing about my siblings, they are as opinionated as me; I can picture it now, BIG MABELLE in tiny house, hahaha!
Mud and clothes don’t really mesh well. You would realized that all that hype about detergent soaps on TV would ease some of the burden, but I gotta tell you, its all b*ll. Words like “ultra”, “with bleach”, “sunshine white”, “lemon scent”, “power cleanser”, “anti-stain formula” or any other b.s. won’t make that stinky-muddy-brown-water-log-shirt into the once white shirt you’ve always loved. Believe me, I REALLY tried, really hard.
Books? We got a million of them, courtesy of my daughters and sister. We save only a few of them, novels, magazines (my mags!!!!!), school/text books, etc., all gone in an instance. The house seems naked without them, but I figured, if we had saved them all, my kids won’t have places on top of the cabinets where we perched along side with the couple of valuables we saved. And don’t try to save the books by drying them under the sun, some Einstein told us it works, and stupid me actually followed the neighbor who I’ve seen trying to talk to a rock (which the neighbors said was the house of the black dwarves). Go figure. I can guarantee you that all the pages will stick, so wet books + sun = a hard object to throw on stupid people, specially the ones who talk to odd looking rocks.
Furniture, wahhhhh! Wooden Shoe rack – gone, Leather couch – something pointed had ripped it during the onslaught of the flood, center table - firewood, dining table – huhuhuhu! Still can be used but needs a new coat of paint plus we need to repair them it wobbles now. Let’s just say, we transferred to the new home lighter than before.
And don’t get me started on the appliances. We had two television sets, now we got one, the other one couldn’t be repaired. The repairman also told me to throw away the washer, it may work sometimes and often times it won’t, plus it might electrocute someone. I test that theory everyday here, sometimes it works, often times it doesn’t, and yes I get a boost of electric ever so often. My husband whines about this, but I hate doing the laundry using my hands, I just joke to him that the electricity makes my blood younger, which makes him madder. But what I am supposed to do, kids makes a mountain of laundry every single day. The desktop computer works even with a virus in it, although the keyboard didn’t. It was fun watching my eldest trying to go online using the onscreen keyboard. I eventually gave in and bought a cheap keyboard, we still don’t got cable and the kids are really whining, specially the little ones, at least this way they can still watch cartoons. The 3 refrigerators I got, only 2 could be repaired. They have to change a part of the motor or something. Other small appliance didn’t survive, coffeemakers, waffle makers, etc. little things we slowly bought.
It sucks. But amazingly, I learn something new every single day and still can see something funny or serious about the situation. Nowadays, my family hates me, you see after the flood, they are required to swim every 4pm. Fifty laps for the older kids, and five for my youngest daughter, for my youngest son, he is just learning, but still comments on how he hates to swim. With my hubby, it’s a little bit harder to badger him to swim everyday, “its not gonna be good if the flood comes and I have to send our youngest to save you” speech gets him to go. They all whine a lot and says I’m overdoing it, and maybe I am overdoing it when I said, next time, we all are going to practice swimming in mud. Call me hyper or crazy, im just making sure that if another flood does come and I won’t be there to save them, at least they would have a fighting chance.
You may think it’s supposed to be faster since most of your things, yup most not half, are considered trash. I think it’s the mentality we have called. You’d try to save anything salvageable or with sentimental value. When the water started to rise, the only things I was able to secure were the pictures and some stuff I couldn’t live without. So sorting thru the “trash” was a horrible experience. Another thing that made it harder was the fact that everyone, I mean everyone was also moving upward because of the flood, so rental fee went up, the house that went P5k before was being rented out between P7500 to P9500. So it was really hard.
The house we got is a miniature one, maybe by our standards. We are used to get a big rental house, probably because we are a big family. I am not really complaining, after looking for almost three weeks, it’s decent enough, but still, every time someone moves, they are bound to hit someone or something. Picture this, when you enter our place, the first thing you’ll see is the dining table and there’s that itsy bitsy space that you can pass thru (if you move sideways, it will be faster and you’ll not bump the wall or the table) so you’ll reach the bedroom door. The only plus thing about having a small house is we didn’t have much to put in it so it will do. But I still worry for the incoming future. You see my relatives from the states are coming, and I don’t have a clue where to put them, maybe I’ll suggest camping under the stars for a day, the kids would have a good time, imagining them all in the house makes me really smile, it would be nice to have them over, cause its been awhile, but I think the house would whine. Gotta make a plan soon, I don’t see my siblings/hubby being comfortable in my place. But I would guarantee the talk we would share about the house. If there’s one thing about my siblings, they are as opinionated as me; I can picture it now, BIG MABELLE in tiny house, hahaha!
Mud and clothes don’t really mesh well. You would realized that all that hype about detergent soaps on TV would ease some of the burden, but I gotta tell you, its all b*ll. Words like “ultra”, “with bleach”, “sunshine white”, “lemon scent”, “power cleanser”, “anti-stain formula” or any other b.s. won’t make that stinky-muddy-brown-water-log-shirt into the once white shirt you’ve always loved. Believe me, I REALLY tried, really hard.
Books? We got a million of them, courtesy of my daughters and sister. We save only a few of them, novels, magazines (my mags!!!!!), school/text books, etc., all gone in an instance. The house seems naked without them, but I figured, if we had saved them all, my kids won’t have places on top of the cabinets where we perched along side with the couple of valuables we saved. And don’t try to save the books by drying them under the sun, some Einstein told us it works, and stupid me actually followed the neighbor who I’ve seen trying to talk to a rock (which the neighbors said was the house of the black dwarves). Go figure. I can guarantee you that all the pages will stick, so wet books + sun = a hard object to throw on stupid people, specially the ones who talk to odd looking rocks.
Furniture, wahhhhh! Wooden Shoe rack – gone, Leather couch – something pointed had ripped it during the onslaught of the flood, center table - firewood, dining table – huhuhuhu! Still can be used but needs a new coat of paint plus we need to repair them it wobbles now. Let’s just say, we transferred to the new home lighter than before.
And don’t get me started on the appliances. We had two television sets, now we got one, the other one couldn’t be repaired. The repairman also told me to throw away the washer, it may work sometimes and often times it won’t, plus it might electrocute someone. I test that theory everyday here, sometimes it works, often times it doesn’t, and yes I get a boost of electric ever so often. My husband whines about this, but I hate doing the laundry using my hands, I just joke to him that the electricity makes my blood younger, which makes him madder. But what I am supposed to do, kids makes a mountain of laundry every single day. The desktop computer works even with a virus in it, although the keyboard didn’t. It was fun watching my eldest trying to go online using the onscreen keyboard. I eventually gave in and bought a cheap keyboard, we still don’t got cable and the kids are really whining, specially the little ones, at least this way they can still watch cartoons. The 3 refrigerators I got, only 2 could be repaired. They have to change a part of the motor or something. Other small appliance didn’t survive, coffeemakers, waffle makers, etc. little things we slowly bought.
It sucks. But amazingly, I learn something new every single day and still can see something funny or serious about the situation. Nowadays, my family hates me, you see after the flood, they are required to swim every 4pm. Fifty laps for the older kids, and five for my youngest daughter, for my youngest son, he is just learning, but still comments on how he hates to swim. With my hubby, it’s a little bit harder to badger him to swim everyday, “its not gonna be good if the flood comes and I have to send our youngest to save you” speech gets him to go. They all whine a lot and says I’m overdoing it, and maybe I am overdoing it when I said, next time, we all are going to practice swimming in mud. Call me hyper or crazy, im just making sure that if another flood does come and I won’t be there to save them, at least they would have a fighting chance.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Death
Whenever a child comes to you with a problem, you readily take it on. You try to make sure whatever it may be, you’ll be there and tackle it with everything you got, to make any problem or pain go away. But what do you do if the problem is death.
It was really hard explaining to the kids about my mom’s death then. I made this speech about her being old already, her heart giving out on her, and so on. I also told them that don’t worry or be sad about mom, because at that moment, she was being taken care of, she was in God’s hand. And it was hard for them to get closure for all they saw of their lola was an urn, but they eventually had gotten over it and started to move on.
But just three days ago, my oldest called me from school, an old friend was shot earlier that morning by a thief. When she came home that day, she was still so sad and all I could do was hug and ask her if she was okay. How do I comfort my child? When a good friend of hers was taken so young, I couldn’t make a speech about being old, or about his heart giving up. And how was I going to explain about the injustice of how he died. How do I make it better? I just wish that my feeble attempt at explaining death would have ease a bit of her pain. Death I realized, is part of life, although painful, it must be acknowledge and accepted.
I fervently hope that the family of my daughter’s friend, would be alright soon. It’s never easy losing someone you really love.
It was really hard explaining to the kids about my mom’s death then. I made this speech about her being old already, her heart giving out on her, and so on. I also told them that don’t worry or be sad about mom, because at that moment, she was being taken care of, she was in God’s hand. And it was hard for them to get closure for all they saw of their lola was an urn, but they eventually had gotten over it and started to move on.
But just three days ago, my oldest called me from school, an old friend was shot earlier that morning by a thief. When she came home that day, she was still so sad and all I could do was hug and ask her if she was okay. How do I comfort my child? When a good friend of hers was taken so young, I couldn’t make a speech about being old, or about his heart giving up. And how was I going to explain about the injustice of how he died. How do I make it better? I just wish that my feeble attempt at explaining death would have ease a bit of her pain. Death I realized, is part of life, although painful, it must be acknowledge and accepted.
I fervently hope that the family of my daughter’s friend, would be alright soon. It’s never easy losing someone you really love.
Friday, October 16, 2009
musing to myself about first names
Having a child is God’s special gift to any parent. You hold in your hands a great deal of power to mold a young being into adulthood, to show a budding mind to wondrous possibilities. And most importantly, to name the child as you see fit, I think that’s the greatest high a parent can have. But lots of parents I realized had something else in mind when they name their young ones. I for one would admit to name my kids so uniquely that I literally misspell their original forms of their names. For instance, instead of using the letter “C”, I use “K”, as an example: Karla instead of Carla.
But nowadays, when my kids introduce me to their new friends, I sometimes do a double take. Their names are getting extreme, I don’t know to the rest of the world if this is not extreme, but here out in the province, it’s a little bit perplexing. I’ve met a Data, a Leader, a Galaxy and Khawla to name a few. I don’t know what and why their parents name them this way, I wish I could ask them, maybe it has special meaning to them, but I don’t know if I can ask without offending. So im stuck to just blogging to myself and keep on wondering why. Oh well, maybe that’s life now, maybe I’ve been keeping myself inside of the house too much, maybe its time to actually get out of the house already, LOL.
But nowadays, when my kids introduce me to their new friends, I sometimes do a double take. Their names are getting extreme, I don’t know to the rest of the world if this is not extreme, but here out in the province, it’s a little bit perplexing. I’ve met a Data, a Leader, a Galaxy and Khawla to name a few. I don’t know what and why their parents name them this way, I wish I could ask them, maybe it has special meaning to them, but I don’t know if I can ask without offending. So im stuck to just blogging to myself and keep on wondering why. Oh well, maybe that’s life now, maybe I’ve been keeping myself inside of the house too much, maybe its time to actually get out of the house already, LOL.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Prayer
With just a snap of a God’s fingers, people went back to the basic. You learn to disengage yourself from your material possessions and value just one thing, . .. .. . life. You won’t mind so much the things you have invested in like the very first lavish leather sofa you yourself bought with your hard earned money. I remember the pride I felt when I bought it, how ever so often, I would sit on it with the lights closed and just immerse myself in it. This was a hard truth you have to accept, and accept graciously. I didn’t even blinked when I saw it all muddy and ruined. All I could see was that God had made sure that anything and everything I invested in, was just that … investments.
To value life was a good first lesson to gain. To be grateful was second, and to always place your life in the Lord’s hand. As what my husband taught us every night, to pray this simple words of faith:
I place this day,
my life,
my love ones,
my works, in the Lord’s hands.
Whatever happens,
whatever results,
If I am in the Lord’s hands,
it is the Lord’s will and it is good.
To value life was a good first lesson to gain. To be grateful was second, and to always place your life in the Lord’s hand. As what my husband taught us every night, to pray this simple words of faith:
I place this day,
my life,
my love ones,
my works, in the Lord’s hands.
Whatever happens,
whatever results,
If I am in the Lord’s hands,
it is the Lord’s will and it is good.
Bagyong Ondoy
When you look at the news, you would see that the rage Mother Nature unleashed during the storm “Ondoy” was really scary. But if you are in the middle of it, and you can’t seem to know how you could protect your four kids from it, while watching the flood water rise, you would undoubtedly say it was downright horrifying.
I’ve always prided myself to be like those mothers that protect their kids at all cost. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a perfect mom, but I strive to be, I discipline my kids, but without any form of violence. I don’t believe in spanking, yelling or torture for them to follow me, do their chores or be nice. So when someone hurts them verbally or physically, I transform into what I call a super mom and attack anybody who has done so. But a mother can only do so much, it’s a different matter when it’s the environment is the aggressor. You’ll be reminded how tiny and defenseless you are in this big world.
The rain started to pour late Friday evening, when we woke up, it was still raining hard that by 7am the electricity dies. I didn’t think much about it, for in our province, whenever it rains hard; the electric company seems to take precautionary measures and shuts off the electric. Due to the location of the house, whenever the electric goes off, the water supply starts to slow down, so when the water did stop, I still didn’t think much of it. It had been a habit that every Saturday we have this late leisurely breakfast between me and the kids, which we had, we talked about things including how foul the weather was, but still I didn’t think much of it. By 10.30 am, the kids were bored and since the younger ones were fascinated with the rain, I let them play out in the rain, I thought to myself, just this once I’ll let them have a “rain shower”. Then I proceeded to video them. They were all shouting and laughing all through out, they were chasing each other with “tabos” and ‘baldes”. I was so caught up in their cute antics that I really didn’t look out to the streets.
I called them in after 20 minutes of playtime, what came next was a great shocker. At first I saw that the streets had water in them, I was so fascinated with the sight that I told the maids to change the clothes of the younger kids for me to keep on watching. It was okay at first but my fascination turned chilly when I notice that every 5 minutes the water seems to rise just about a foot high, I called my eldest and showed her the water rising, then I told the our houseboy to look at the main road and report to me what the main road looks like down the bend. When he came back, his shorts were muddy and wet and he reported that the water down the main road was up to thigh high and it seems that it was rising. I started to be concern, I’ve never been one to panic, but that day, a chill was creeping up my spine and couldn’t shake the feeling, instincts told me to get ready. I went this time to my cousin’s house which was also my neighbor and was aghast that they were starting to pack and was planning to evacuate. He told me that never in his lifetime living in this area had flood water came into his house, and by this time the water in his house was just below the knee.
Although, there wasn’t any flood water yet in my home, I started to instruct to pack a change of clothes for everyone, at the same time I had instructed everyone to put all the valuable items and appliances, including precious pictures and books to the tallest part of the house. In less than an hour, we were prepared to leave our home and go to my mother-in-law’s house, I deduced that since she had a second floor, we would be safe there no matter what. I told the boy to go ahead and bring the things to my in-laws house. But just in a few minutes, he came back to report that the water up ahead the bend was starting to rise and this time it was rushing in down the streets. His clothes were wet up to his waist now, and I have concluded it was better not to chance the roads, since he did say even he was having a hard time crossing the road, how much more a kid or someone holding a kid.
In less than an hour, I saw the water slowly rise steadily at first, and then I think before noon, I head this great big sound like a muted boom, and water came in a rush, it entered the house so fast that I thought to myself, this can’t be happening. We placed the kids up the furniture that was tall but still it was not high enough, we transferred them up the tall cabinets and this time the water couldn’t reach them, but the water was still rising, I started to look a way out just in case the water does still go up. I found an opening on the roof that went up the roof and had it ready, I asked the Lord to stop the water from rushing in, and it seems that He heard us, for the water stopped coming in.
They said that when you’re in danger, your life flashes before your eyes. I totally don’t believe that. Because at that particular moment, all I can think about was that I need to make sure my kids would be fine, I keep planning one step ahead, trying to out think what would come next. I was so afraid that more was coming, so I talked to the kids and told them to get ready; I told them what the plan was, and how we were suppose to do it. But even with the plan, I realized that something might go wrong, and securing the kids with plans was not enough.
God must have been watching us and made sure we were alright. But it showed me that I can’t protect my kids from everything. And I hate that feeling that I can’t always secure them. But on the other hand, I saw the strength of my two older daughters, how responsible they can be. They didn’t whine or cry but was planning along side with me. I also learned to value life and be gracious about everything around me, the smiling faces of my family, the rainbow, the chirping of the birds, even the noisy neighbors; it is really good to be alive!
I’ve always prided myself to be like those mothers that protect their kids at all cost. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a perfect mom, but I strive to be, I discipline my kids, but without any form of violence. I don’t believe in spanking, yelling or torture for them to follow me, do their chores or be nice. So when someone hurts them verbally or physically, I transform into what I call a super mom and attack anybody who has done so. But a mother can only do so much, it’s a different matter when it’s the environment is the aggressor. You’ll be reminded how tiny and defenseless you are in this big world.
The rain started to pour late Friday evening, when we woke up, it was still raining hard that by 7am the electricity dies. I didn’t think much about it, for in our province, whenever it rains hard; the electric company seems to take precautionary measures and shuts off the electric. Due to the location of the house, whenever the electric goes off, the water supply starts to slow down, so when the water did stop, I still didn’t think much of it. It had been a habit that every Saturday we have this late leisurely breakfast between me and the kids, which we had, we talked about things including how foul the weather was, but still I didn’t think much of it. By 10.30 am, the kids were bored and since the younger ones were fascinated with the rain, I let them play out in the rain, I thought to myself, just this once I’ll let them have a “rain shower”. Then I proceeded to video them. They were all shouting and laughing all through out, they were chasing each other with “tabos” and ‘baldes”. I was so caught up in their cute antics that I really didn’t look out to the streets.
I called them in after 20 minutes of playtime, what came next was a great shocker. At first I saw that the streets had water in them, I was so fascinated with the sight that I told the maids to change the clothes of the younger kids for me to keep on watching. It was okay at first but my fascination turned chilly when I notice that every 5 minutes the water seems to rise just about a foot high, I called my eldest and showed her the water rising, then I told the our houseboy to look at the main road and report to me what the main road looks like down the bend. When he came back, his shorts were muddy and wet and he reported that the water down the main road was up to thigh high and it seems that it was rising. I started to be concern, I’ve never been one to panic, but that day, a chill was creeping up my spine and couldn’t shake the feeling, instincts told me to get ready. I went this time to my cousin’s house which was also my neighbor and was aghast that they were starting to pack and was planning to evacuate. He told me that never in his lifetime living in this area had flood water came into his house, and by this time the water in his house was just below the knee.
Although, there wasn’t any flood water yet in my home, I started to instruct to pack a change of clothes for everyone, at the same time I had instructed everyone to put all the valuable items and appliances, including precious pictures and books to the tallest part of the house. In less than an hour, we were prepared to leave our home and go to my mother-in-law’s house, I deduced that since she had a second floor, we would be safe there no matter what. I told the boy to go ahead and bring the things to my in-laws house. But just in a few minutes, he came back to report that the water up ahead the bend was starting to rise and this time it was rushing in down the streets. His clothes were wet up to his waist now, and I have concluded it was better not to chance the roads, since he did say even he was having a hard time crossing the road, how much more a kid or someone holding a kid.
In less than an hour, I saw the water slowly rise steadily at first, and then I think before noon, I head this great big sound like a muted boom, and water came in a rush, it entered the house so fast that I thought to myself, this can’t be happening. We placed the kids up the furniture that was tall but still it was not high enough, we transferred them up the tall cabinets and this time the water couldn’t reach them, but the water was still rising, I started to look a way out just in case the water does still go up. I found an opening on the roof that went up the roof and had it ready, I asked the Lord to stop the water from rushing in, and it seems that He heard us, for the water stopped coming in.
They said that when you’re in danger, your life flashes before your eyes. I totally don’t believe that. Because at that particular moment, all I can think about was that I need to make sure my kids would be fine, I keep planning one step ahead, trying to out think what would come next. I was so afraid that more was coming, so I talked to the kids and told them to get ready; I told them what the plan was, and how we were suppose to do it. But even with the plan, I realized that something might go wrong, and securing the kids with plans was not enough.
God must have been watching us and made sure we were alright. But it showed me that I can’t protect my kids from everything. And I hate that feeling that I can’t always secure them. But on the other hand, I saw the strength of my two older daughters, how responsible they can be. They didn’t whine or cry but was planning along side with me. I also learned to value life and be gracious about everything around me, the smiling faces of my family, the rainbow, the chirping of the birds, even the noisy neighbors; it is really good to be alive!
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